How can we free ourselves from imposed religious beliefs?

"I believe what I was raised to believe." Captain Jim Boyd, Anne's House of Dreams by L.M. Montgomery.


  How many people can say that nowadays? Offhand, I can count most of my family and friends. But why is that? Well, it's certainly easier than challenging the established tenets of our environment, whether it be family, friends or community. It is a rare person who has the courage to stand up and say "You know something? I don't buy that." Usually whoever does that is branded as crazy (best case scenario) or simply shunned and ostracized (worst case scenario).
  I'm one of the lucky ones; my family simply roll their eyes at me and call me crazy. Frankly, I don't care. I believe everyone is entitled to their own opinions and beliefs and, when I started doubting what I'd been taught, I decided to research. So I read everything I could get my hands on regarding my family's religion, which is Roman Catholicism. Well, I can tell you I did not have far to go to decide the hypocrisy of the clergy did not sit well with me. Furthermore, after seriously thinking about it, I decided I simply didn't believe their teachings. As you can imagine, the day I voiced this out loud all hell broke loose.

  My dad, who had encouraged my sisters and me to always take information apart, analyze it and decide for ourselves, was the most shocked of all. He never realized I would take this course with the beliefs of my forefathers. Fortunately my mom is more laid back and merely told me she didn't agree with my views. As for the rest of my relatives (great aunts and such) they flat out didn't believe me until I proved it.
  How did I do that, you ask? Little things: for example, although I wouldn't be caught dead going into Mass on a Sunday, when there is a funeral or a wedding or some such family event, I simply refrain from kneeling or praying. I stand up as is respctful of any religion and as I would do were I in any temple whether it be Protestant, Jewish, Islamic or Hindu. I voice my opinion but I don't try to convince anyone of my views (after all, that's one of the things I hate most about Christianity in general, Catholicism in particular) and listen respectfully when one of my great aunts (as they periodically do) takes another go at "saving my soul".
  The thing is, religion and spirituality are very personal. The religion you practice or the belief you hold is on a "need to know basis" and not everybody needs to know, especially if you're going to start World War III at your grandma's house. Case in point: my husbands grandmothers are both extremely religious. One of them even went so far as to ask me to "bring that heretic back in line" when we got married. I will tell you I was hard-pressed not to laugh but why would I want to hurt a sweet old lady and get my husband into a boiling pot of family problems? So I smiled and let her assume what she would.
  If you're having second thoughts about "what you were raised to believe", inform yourself. Read about the history of your present religion and find out what all sides have to say for themselves, then think it over, digest it, take the next obvious step and decide if it is for you or not.
  And, really, the way to go about it is: quietly. You might decide to tell your parents and you'll certainly have to let your husband/wife/partner know, particularly if you have or are planning to have children because that could turn into a big, fat issue if it isn't handled with the utmost honesty and respect for each other's beliefs, but as far as the rest of the world goes, it's none of their business.